How To Stop Phone Solicitors

Dear Reid,

I have been getting a lot of phone calls asking me to try their credit cards. I try to say no, but they won’t let me. So I say yes just to make them stop. Now I have close to 50 credit cards and no more room in my wallet. What do I do to make them stop without saying yes?

Sincerely,
Can’t Say No

Don’t you hate those phone solicitors? Man, they piss me off. The only way I’ve found to deal with those jerks that wake you up in the morning soliciting their crappy cards has been to tell them this: “I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now. Why don’t you just give me your home phone number so I can call you up at some ungodly time of the morning and harass you. While you’re at it, give me your home address so I can flood your mailbox with trivial offers for overpriced pieces of clay that sprout grass.” Then, having shut them up for a second, you can hang up the phone without feeling rude for cutting them off in the middle of a sentence.

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