Dress Codes

Dear Reid,

This weekend I am participating in the Tinman Triathalon. I feel that their uniform regulations are very restricting. I would like to do the entire race in just a jock strap. Do you think this would be frowned upon by the Tinman? If it is frowned upon, can you use your celebrity power to influence a rule change?

Sincerely,
Athletic Supporter

Alas, my fame has not reached the extent at which I am able to influence rule changes in other organizations at my whim. However, might I say that I am in full support – pardon the pun – of your cause. I think dress codes are a horrifying violation of our personal right to freedom of expression. Pretty soon this school will have us in uniforms. I, for one, will not stand for this. No way am I going to wear a blue blazer and checkered shirt to class every day. Where does it all end?

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