Is the tagline not clear enough?

Dear Reid,

There is this guy who I really like and my friends asked him if he liked me, and he said he liked me a little but that he was going to ask another girl out. But then I found out that when he was about to ask her out he just ran away. So here is my question: does he like me or not?

Everygirl #1

I know how you feel. But more importantly, I know how he feels, because you just freaking told me. He likes you a little, but he likes the other girl better. He likes her enough that he’s afraid of being rejected by her, and thus ran away before working up the courage to ask for a date. Happens to me all the time, and I’m not even in junior high anymore. Get over him and find some other boy to like. They’re all basically the same, anyway. Go listen to some Avril Lavigne or something if you want a more sympathetic viewpoint.

Dear Reid,

I have a big problem. I like this guy a lot and I’ve never felt like this before with a guy ever. He has treated me with so much respect and when I broke up with my ex-boyfriend he was there for me the whole time. He’s a real good friend but now I think he really likes me which really makes me happy. But the thing is he is going out with his girlfriend who has been going out with him for about 16 months. I also know his girlfriend and we are really close. What should I do?

Everygirl #2

I know how you feel. But more importantly, I know how he feels, because you just freaking told me. He likes you a little, but he likes the other girl better. He likes her enough to have dated her for 16 months, which at your age is pretty damn long, and at my age would have her holding back sex until she gets a ring. Get over him and find some other boy to like. They’re all basically the same, anyway. Go listen to some Michelle Branch or something if you want a more sympathetic viewpoint.

Dear Reid,

There is this guy that I like but he is going out with one of my friends, and I think he might be flirting with me. I really like him a lot. I guess I flirted back but I’m not sure. He said he doesn’t ever see his girlfriend. What should I do?

Everygirl #3

I know how you feel. But more importantly, I know how he feels, because you just freaking told me. He likes you a little, but he likes the other girl better. He likes her enough to be still be dating her even though he doesn’t get to see her very often. Why on earth would you want to spoil a perfectly good friendship by stealing your friend’s guy? Get over him and find some other boy to like. They’re all basically the same, anyway. Go listen to some Liz Phair or something if you want a more sympathetic viewpoint.

Dear Reid,

I have been friends with this guy for like 6 months and I am now extremely attracted to him. He has been a good example for me and he has helped me grow spiritually. He always knows what to say to make the worst day seem awesome! He can always make me laugh and smile. He is always nice and kind to me.

What I want to know though is if he likes me too. Because he is such a strong Christian he tells every one he know he loves them in Christ, so I know that that is not particularly meant in a way expressing his feelings towards me. But he always says sweet stuff to me like, “Goodnight my love,” and “Hello Sweet pea,” and “Hello darling, how was your day?” Do these little sayings mean that he likes me or is he just being nice?

Confused Lelandite (a.k.a. Everygirl #4)

I know how you feel. But more importantly, I know how he feels, because you just freaking told me. He likes you a little, but he likes the Lord better. He likes Him enough to go around preaching to everyone he comes across, apparently. Get over him and find some other boy to like. They’re all basically the same, anyway. Actually, now that I think about it, this guy might be a little bit different than most. Go listen to some Amy Grant or something if you want a more sympathetic viewpoint.

You are all driving me nuts. There was a time when I thought people actually had unique experiences and personalities, but the longer I run this Web site the more I begin to believe that we are no different from any other insect, bird, fish or mammal on this planet. Everyone basically acts the same, following purely mechanical instincts, running around in circles, never getting anywhere. It’s only our uncanny ability to wreak havoc on each other (and on other species) that separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom. Except for reptiles, because they’ve got some wicked-cool stuff we can’t even touch. Limb regeneration? Forked tongues? Now, that’s a superior life form.

Seriously, is the tagline not clear enough?

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