Phone sex virgin

Dear Reid,

So, I was on a first date a few weeks ago. We had sky-diving lessons, vegetarian sushi, and a paddle boat tour of his private lake—who wouldn’t have a good time? He was the perfect combination of charming and goofy and I was completely head-over-heels. But it took an odd turn and I’m not sure what to do now.

At the end of the date, he asked if I’d like him to call me after he’d taken me home. Thinking he just could not survive without hearing my voice every fifteen minutes, I smiled flirtatiously and said, “Of course!” But I quickly found out that I had completely misunderstood. He called, asked me what I was wearing and—Well, I’ll just say what I finally said to him: I’ve NEVER had a phone call like THAT (and certainly not immediately after a first date).

I felt very uncomfortable, because it took me by surprise and because I am a phone sex virgin. But we’d just had an amazing date, and I was very flattered, so I didn’t want to embarrass him. (By the way, he certainly knew what he was doing. I alternated between being embarrassed and being interested.) But unfortunately, I couldn’t bring myself to respond in kind, and can only imagine what he thinks now. We’ve only been on one date since then, and it was Awkward City. I like this guy tons, Reid. What should I do?

Embarrassed in Embarrass

I know how you feel. It just doesn’t get any more awkward than those unexpected immediately-after-the-first-date phone calls. I mean, if Swingers taught us anything, it’s that you’re supposed to wait three days to call a girl. Anything before that, and you seem over-eager. Anything longer, and you risk losing her interest. But three days, baby, that’s money.

If I were you, I’d just try to pretend that phone call never happened. I mean, this guy was clearly out of his mind to call so soon. It may have had something to do with your intoxicating perfume, or with a dizzy head rush from all the sky-diving. You should chalk it up to first date jitters and leave it at that. In the future, though, if he calls outside of the three-day window, it’s probably best if you just let your answering machine pick up.

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