New in town

Dear Reid,

I just moved here, and I am having trouble getting used to the area. I really don’t know anyone, so I don’t even have anyone to ask what people do for fun around here. Anyways, I saw this myspace stuff and I thought maybe I could meet someone here that could show me a good time. I started looking through the profiles and decided that since I put up an ad, I might as well try responding to some people to see if they are interested. I’m not looking for anything serious.
Well your ad caught my attention so I thought I might see if you may be interested in a girl that’s new to town and looking for some action. Anyways, I would love to know if you might be interested and if you have any ideas for me. I RARELY get the chance to check this account, so if your down then get back to me at and I can send you some more pics. Maybe I’ll even give you a look at my webcam! 😉 Sorry for writing you out of nowhere, but I had to try something—I’m going crazy from loneliness around here. I really need some action!

Naughty but Nice

I know how you feel. It’s hard getting used to a new place when you first move there. When I bought a condo last year, it was the first time I’d ever had someone living above me, and it kept freaking me out to hear footsteps creaking from the floor above. See, previously I’d always lived in a standalone house, and even though for a while my bedroom was on the lower level, the building was sturdy enough so that the floorboards didn’t creak. Now I live in a much older building, and there doesn’t appear to be any insulation at all between floors. Anyway, I’ve gotten pretty used to it over the last few months. I can even sleep through the sirens from the nearby medical center and fire stations at this point.

Another thing about my condo: the bathroom shares a wall with the bathroom in the unit next door, and there’s a ventilation shaft that goes by the one upstairs. So, I can pretty much hear any noise anybody makes when they’re in the bathroom. It’s quite striking just how clearly voices travel through that wall, let alone other bathroom-related sounds. I make it a point to do most of my Number Twos at work. At least in a public restroom stall, you know when there’s someone there listening to you. Plus, it saves on having to buy toilet paper.

A bit of advice, if you don’t mind: In the future, you may want to consider leaving a few more clothes on in the photos you include when you e-mail a stranger. It makes an odd first impression to see you in such an, er, familiar position. Some people might find that intimidating—or worse, titillating. You wouldn’t want anybody to get the wrong idea!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: